It’s amazing that one woman can make me not hate an entire country. That’s the power that Jennifer England has over me. I hope she never finds out that I’m worth close to 800 million dollars. I don’t know what that is in Pounds or Euros or whatever it is that they have over there in England, but I think it’s still quite a bit of loot.
Based on these pictures, I’m willing to believe that the only article of clothing that Jennifer owns are bikinis. I’m also willing to believe that I would drink all of her bath water through a straw, just to savor the taste. Until I get that chance, I’ll continue to have imaginary conversations with her in which she thinks I’m the funniest guy in all of England.
Wait, I’ve just been told that Jennifer England is an American, born in Lansing, Michigan. I guess I can go back to hating England.
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